Author: lcarlson

Shovels

Shovel Museum Dear DMC, I am happy to report the existence of the “Shovel Museum”...

A dog went into a telegraph office to send a telegram. The dog wrote: “Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof.” The clerk read what the dog wrote and said, “There are only nine words here. You...

Two fonts in a bar

Two fonts, Verdana and Helvetica, walk into a bar. The bartender, when he sees them, shouts, “Hey you two, please get out. We don’t serve your type in here.”

Termite in Bar

A termite walks into a bar. The termite asks a question. “Is the bartender here?”

Puns for Higher IQs

Dear DMC, For the Groaners from Grover page? Steve ReszetriakLondon — — — Dear Steve, Yes, these belong on Groaners from Grover. Perhaps the full name of the page should be Groaners from Grover and Friends. Grover Puns for...

Albert Einstein
“A calm and modest life brings more happiness than the pursuit of success combined with constant restlessness”

~ Albert Einstein
Edward R. Murrow
“The obscure we see eventually. The completely obvious, it seems, takes longer”

~ Edward R. Murrow
Hoagy Carmichael
"Slow motion gets you there faster"

~ Hoagy Carmichael
Marilyn Thomsen
"While it takes courage to achieve greatness, it takes more courage to find fulfilment in being ordinary"

~ Marilyn Thomsen
testi 1
“We’re giving a good name to a four-letter word — dull”
testi 2
“Glitz and glam — not worth the bother”
testi 3
“We don’t try to keep up with the Joneses — who are the Joneses anyway?”
testi 4
“Time is a great invention — it’s what keeps everything from happening all at once”
Will Rogers
“Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there”

~ Will Rogers