Xmas squirrles and crackers

Today, Boxing Day, we squirrel away our Christmas Crackers for another year, will bring them out again next December.

Before we close the box, do you have any you’d like to put in it? If so, please email to contactus@dullmensclub.com.


Christmas Quackers — two of the dumber ones this year:

Where to you go to weigh a whale?

To a whale weigh station

From  Steve Morton

What’s brown and sticky?
A stick

From Steve Reszetniak, who says it’s one of his favorites

Xmas crackers ducks


Steve Reszetniak then redeemed himself:

Xmas cracker Steve 1

Xmas cracker Steve 2

Xmas cracker Steve 3


Dec Xmas crackers

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can Ho Ho Ho

Why does Santa go down the chimney?

It soots him

What’s Santa’s favorite cereal?

Frosties

Where does Santa stay when he travels?

At the Ho Ho Hotel

Why would you remove your door bell?

To win the no bell prize

What did the snowman say to the other snowman who was standing next to him?

I smell carrots

What do you give a railway station master for Christmas?

Platform shoes

How does the Pacific Ocean greet the Atlantic Ocean?

It waves

Dec 2 Crackers


Christmas Crackers — a British Tradition — History

For readers not familiar with the British Christmas tradition of Christmas crackers, here’s some background.

Christmas crackers are brightly colored paper tubes that are placed on each plate at Christmas parties.

christmas cracker on plate

The tube, when pulled on each end, it breaks open with a cracking – exploding – sound. A paper slip with a joke and a paper crown fall out.

Christmas crackers were invented by Thomas Smith in 1846 when he was visiting Paris. He came across a bon-bon, a sugar-almond wrapped in tissue paper. Smith began importing bon-bons to England.

The bob-bons sold well in England at Christmas but not other times of the year.

In the 1850s, Smith started putting mottos in the bob-bons. As bon-bons were often bought by men to give to women, many of the mottos were love poems.

In 1860, Smith added the banger — two strips of chemically impregnated paper that made a cracking sound when pulled apart.

Over time, jokes replaced the love poems.

More information about this can be found on this website:  http://resources.woodlands-junior.kent.sch.uk/customs/xmas/crackers.html

250px-christmascrackers_2


26 December 2015